Posts from former Discussion pages 

When Will DCFS realize the emotional/mental abuse
(Children's Services, Child Protective Services)

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Post #   0000056a
When Will DCFS realize the emotional/mental abuse
From: accused again unsubstatiated
Remote Name: 68.89.229.180

Comments
My ex actually got my daughter to say I sexually abused her! My heart fell to my toes and shattered. Thankfully she was ordered into counseling where she told the therapist her "mom told her to lie" and she "didn't want to get mom in trouble" etc. at the very first session following 40 days of no contact at all with me. This is the second time w/daughter and two prior abuse allegations from my son who I have had custody of. Alienator's are so disturbed, I think they believe the lies themselves. This is most definitely mental/emotional abuse which is so severe my kids are suffering now from ADHD/ODD, Depression, Anxiety, Paranoia etc. These false allegations and all the other manipulating/brainwashing tactics used to alienate innocent kids because of her jealousy, need to control, hatred & desire to create chaos in my life or, even better, put me in prison. I'm shocked and concerned that it is not considered by Case workers, et al, to be far worse, and much harder & longer for kids to heal from, if at all, than their definition of "emotional abuse" i.e. cussing at, calling names or belittling children. Unless your kids are showing visible signs of "physical" abuse, they're SOL for protection. It's a sad sad world full of EVIL adults which do not deserve to carry the title of parent.   (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

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REPLIES:

Post # 0000056e
Re: When Will DCFS realize the emotional/mental abuse
From: angryatthwrld
Remote Name: 68.14.90.78

Comments
You would think, common sense would dictate that the alienators get locked up, and treated for their sick thinking and behavioral patterns. I think the whole reason they are left untreated is because lawmakers/ law enforcers have limited exposure to them, they sympathize. Let them all live a day in the life of the alienated, or the family members of the alienated. We live with worry, fear, anger, anxiety, etc daily. A 20 minute court session is HARDLY enough to qualify for determining the best interest of any child. Also, I think that this situation is enough to make anybody crazy...I'm on the verge of giving up hope on any system because of what I've witnessed over thee last 2 yrs. I'm done. Quit. Fed up with all the apathy and injustice with little or no reward, and all heartache. No proof, or little proof that anybody really cares, except everyone who found this site out of situational desperation. And as the stepmother of a child caught in the middle, I cry regularly at the injustice of the situation. I see her fear, her angst, her falling through the cracks, and I have little or no control, other than the demise of my own relationship with her father in efforts to control and prevent further injustice and pain. >>by the way, it doesn't work!!!...yet I still find myself trying to control the situation. He and I dont live through one day without mention of the situation, or his ex, because something always comes up...whether we want it or not, it ALWAYS does. Her schooling, her health, her programmed words, his visitations, her lack of sleep, her hygeine, etc, etc. I want to have the 'growing up girl talk' with her, because she's nearing that age, but I fear mom will throw a fit, or twist it into abuse charges because I told her about menses too soon!!! I'm sick of that too. A girl should know what to expect, before it happens, especially if she's showing signs of pre puberty. And when a girl asks "what is your period?", one should be able to answer without fear of MOM getting offended. I told her to ask her mom and if she doesn't understand, then I'll help her to understand. Also, How do you carry on with a spouse, and have a life outside of his ex's constant attacks. How can any couple survive when theres NEVER a dull moment. And not for nothing, but our physical relationship has dwindled to almost null and void, and I blame it on her. She may have once done it for him, but she doesn't do it for me... She's always there... how do you make her go away... How does anyone forget for just a moment that it's all chaos and nobody cares? HOW?  (Last changed: February 26, 2006 )

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Post # 000005c2
Re: When Will DCFS realize the emotional/mental abuse
From: Debbie
Remote Name: 68.114.121.226

Comments
First of all, what my husband reminds me of is, she wants your marriage to fail. Why would you give her what she wants? Make your marriage the best it can be. Surprise him. Plan a getaway. A small weekend trip can make the world go away. I can't tell you how many trips we've gone on in the last few years. Get on the internet. Travelzoo.com has incredible last minute specials that will blow you away. Escape is necessary. Second, My husband has NEVER had any visitation, despite a joint custody order. So consider the fact that you have a relationship with this child a blessing. Third, as a mom with a daughter, let me tell you what it feels like to have another woman make choices about what is right for your daughter. She got my daughter buying thong underware at Victoria Secret. She allowed my daughter to have her boyfriend in the house when no adults were home. This was not only a bad thing for my daughter, but also for the younger brothers at home. It came down to the point where, the only thing I was able to for my daughter was take her to the gynocologist for birth control. This is not at all where I wanted my daughter to be at that time in her life, but that right to parent her was stolen from me. She also hired my daughter to work in her salon. My daughters grades did not substantiate an after school job. But she had my daughter washing the hair of my husbands exwife and his three childen. These are the three children that have been alienated from him. We have two very sick woman, trying to mess up our lives. But, despite them, I hold him everynight and am very greatful to have him. You see, things could be much worse.  (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

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Post #  000005ed
Re: When Will DCFS realize the emotional/mental abuse
From: New law trying to take care of this
Remote Name: 68.114.121.226

Comments
go to www.helpstoppas.com and look at the recent articles. There is one about a woman in San Antonio who is trying to pass a bill to make false accusations of abuse punishable. She is using a case where granparents have been cut out of thier deceased daughters childrens lives. I think grandparents in this case should draw a fair amount of sympathy and awareness that the typical dad shut out cannot do. Check out this site. It is making some great steps and we all have to be aware and loud about the Lohstroh case.   (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

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Post # 0000065e and 00000660
Re: When Will DCFS realize the emotional/mental abuse
From: Family suffering - STILL
Remote Name: 68.89.228.73

Comments
we finally received sole legal custody of my 2 stepkids!!!! After 3 yrs of court battle. Expert witness psycologist was a huge help in seeing through the madness of H's ex. HOWEVER - the madness never stops. Ex continues to call police if we punish daughter, DFS 3X on her (include sex allegation - false & unsubstatiated) and 2x on son (physical allegation - outcome same). PAS continues w/9 yr old daughter, she was w/mom until 11/8/04. Son we've had since 01/1999. Police came to our home last night due to mom's (incessant) pc to our house during a fit 9yr old threw and mom heard in background & was told daughter had no pc privileges due to behavior. mom's response = call 911 and prob DFS, still waiting & wondering when it will stop.    (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

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Post #  000007d7
Re: When Will DCFS realize the emotional/mental abuse
From: gyzmo64
Remote Name: 70.105.95.168

Comments
Recently my grandson who is 3 months old was taken from my home by police officers and DCFS they came to my home on a complaint of drug use. My cousin was arrested at that time for having drugs on his person, how was we supposed to know this. They took my Grandbaby and said he was undernourished he weighed 5lbs. 13 oz. when he was born EARLY. He now weighs 9 lbs. His Dr. says he's perfect but the Dr. they took him to says other wise, so they won't let my daughter have her baby back. We went to court today and because of hearsay told my daughter she could not have him back, and gave her another court date of JULY 25th almost a month away, she's never even spent one night away from him since he was born.  She and I are both just devistated over the way this was done, we miss our little pride and joy. What can we do to get our baby boy back, she is going to get visitation with him but we don't know when, but only the parents get to see him what about all the grandparents out there who LOVE thier grandbabies as much as I do. Where are our rights? We LOVE you Keaton Duane! LOVE and KISSES from mommy, grandma, daddy, grandpa, aunts, uncles and cousins We MISS you baby    (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

 

 

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