Posts from former Discussion pages 

Being Vocal about Alienation

("ARE YOU ALLOWED TO READ ME A STORY YET?")

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Post # 00000039
A VOICE TO BE HEARD
From: ELAINE SASSOWER-BERLIN
Date: 9/8/00
Time: 4:56:28 PM
Remote Name: 205.188.197.26

Comments
I AM THE MOTHER OF THREE WONDERFUL CHILDREN, I HAVE BEEN ALIENATED FROM THEM BY THEIR FATHER.
I AM ALSO A DOCUMENTARY FILMMAKER AND AM IN PRE-PRODUCTION OF "ARE YOU ALLOWED TO READ ME A STORY YET?" - WHICH WILL FOCUS ON PARENTS WHO HAVE LOST THE RIGHT TO PARENT AS A RESULT OF A CUSTODY DISPUTE.
IF YOU ARE WILLING TO VOLUNTEER TO PARTICIPATE IN THIS FILM PLEASE CONTACT ME AT NYLainy@aol.com
WITHOUT A VOCAL VOICE - WE WILL NOT BE HEARD.   (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

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REPLIES:

Post # Post # 00000063 and 00000064
Re: A VOICE TO BE HEARD
From: mofford
Date: 11/7/00
Time: 4:33:06 AM
Remote Name: 63.20.85.28

Comments
i am a victim of domestic abuse. i left my ex boyfriend and fled with my three sons to my parents home in New Mexico. he followed me there and attacked, beat me and kidnapped his son my baby David who at the time was three months old. i obtained a protection order and custody order through court the following day. however when i decided to fly back to his home state where i initially fled the police, dhr and the da's office would not assist me other that to tell me of an exparte full custody hearing set for the following day. i appeared to their surprise and the judge would not honor my police report, my witness statements, my apparant bruises and cuts on my face, my custody and my protection order. he gave me and his father shared custody. my home, job and family (2 sons ages 4 and 5 from a previous relationship) were in New Mexico. 

the judge wanted to detain me in my ex's state until i could get an attorney to fight for custody that i already had. i left and went back to new mexico with my infant son and the judge ordered me to return with my son or be picked up on federal charges of kidnapping. my ex is currently charged with interference of custody, assault to a household member, assault with aggravated battery and child abuse with reckless endangerment. i returned and was incarcerated for two weeks. my infant was taken out of my arms and i was jailed with baby killers, murderers, drug dealers, etc... i contacted a local politician i had worked with and he helped me to get a prominent attorney. 

i was also charged with interference of custody which was dismissed. my attorney has filed a federal civil case action against my ex and the judge that incarcerated me. I am in new mexico now and I haven't seen my son who is now 8 months old for two months. his father is unemployed, unstable, has no home, no income, is in arrears for child support to his first two children for over a year and i have lost two homes, two jobs however i regain a home and a job upon my return to new mexico. i am currently waiting for a court date in federal court.

the judge that incarcerated me had to let me go however he only gave me supervised, limited visitation with my son under his father's supervision on the 1st and third sunday of each month from 2:30 to 4:30 p.m. only in Birmingham, Alabama until February 6, 2001 when he set a custody court date. My lawyer told me not to worry about the court date because of the lawsuit we filed in federal court and due to the nature of the custody order and charges in another state it will more than likely be heard in federal court first. 

I am depressed and i feel like i am losing the bond i had with my son. I am his MOTHER and he is still a BABY. I had to stop nursing him and i worry that he won't remember me. His brother's miss him very much. my main motivation for leaving my ex was because of his abusive behavior toward my other two son's who are not his. He wanted to spank them and belittle them all the time. I couldn't bear it anymore especially when he became violent toward me during my last month of pregnancy. if you think my story is worth hearing let me know. this is my first experience, everyone i talk to in my family and my friends keep telling me you will get your baby back. it is beginning to sound redundant and shallow. and the looks i get from them are of boredom and complacency and patronizing. 

i wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy if i had one. i can't sleep at night i try not to think of him however i end up dreaming about him and it hurts. i feel like i cannot move on and everyone around me thinks i should be alright with this. my email is shelbell16@hotmail.com. Thanks.  (Last changed: February 26, 2006 )

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Related posting...

Post # 00000076
Re: ARE YOU ALLOWED TO READ ME A STORY YET
From: barbiewolfe@hotmail.com
Date: 1/18/01
Time: 6:11:08 PM
Remote Name: 172.136.21.11

Comments
I don't know how far away you are or whether it is too late to respond but I would be very interested to provide whatever input you may require. Both my boyfriend, now divorced, and myself, seperated 14 months, are having our lives emotionally destroyed by obsessive parental alienators. His has been in court for some time - 3 children whom it took 14 months for a first supervised visit- she has had him thrown in jail & the pysch ward all to prove he is dangerous. 

I am now the court-appointed supervisor for his limited visits. He is an extraordinary father - rational, caring, affectionate.- mine has not yet gone to court (my 13 year old is in a group home unable to function and my 12 year old recently left to live with his dad because he feels I destroyed the family and his dad needs his 100% loyalty. His father has encouraged these children to hate me by escalating bizarre fabrications. I am being told that given their ages there is little point in fighting custody as they will make their own choices about where to live). That's it in a nutshell...Barbara
(Last changed: February 26, 2006 )

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