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Is this Alienation?

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Post #  000005e8
Is thi alianation  [Note: Is this Alienation?]
From: Loving Father
Remote Name: 4.244.174.180

Comments
My daughter mom is wanting to modify our order regarding visitation and custody since I filed my motion to modify travel expenses since I live 600 miles away. After I filed my motion I get one from her saying she should have full custody becaus eof the following: I spanked my daughter during her summer visitation and my daughter don't know why she was spanked.( her mother and step-father spank her), My sister n law told them not to run in and out so my daughter told her counsler that Aunt Hope wouldn't let her in to use rest room or get a drink her other sibilings say this isn't true, That I need anger management cause I spanked her, that I should only get two weeks in the summer, she wants more child support it just goes on and on. I knew about none of this until I was served 6 mos after my daughters summer visitation. I am never told of Dr. appt., School activities ect. But she says I have a problem. I only get to she my daughter 3 times a year and have only requested 6 weeks in the summer with her mother a weekend during that time. I am allowed all but three weeks of her summer according to SD guidelines. She hasn't used her one weekend yet says I get stressed because 6 weeks is to long. Is this parent alianation? She has said she wants a fairy tale family that her husband is a better father than I am cause he is with my daughter daily. She wants all contorl of her life with me visits on her terms!!! Help Email me at cfparalegal74@netzero.net if you have anything or info that can help   (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

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REPLIES:

Post # 000005f1
Re: Is this alianation
From: response to a father from a mom who lost her girls
Remote Name: 150.142.236.198

Comments
yes it is alienation, get a lawyer quick before its too late, take it from some one who is in the same boat right now , after several hearings, you must PROVE your case, good luck. document everything and record phone calls if you can only of your ex not the kids (courts disapprove) make every attempt to keep the bond. and never give up pray pray ,,,and join a mom who is torn apart.  (Last changed: February 26, 2006 )

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Post # 000005fb
Re: Is thi alianation
From: Non-custodial loving father
Remote Name: 24.111.34.251

Comments
I sympathize with your situation. I have been involved with a similar situation. My oldest daughter is now married, (I had full custody of her) in college and has her own child but it was very difficult raising her with her mother constantly pitting her against me, even to the point of convincing my daughter to file false assult charges against me so that her mother could "get him in enough trouble to take him back to court and get custody of you" as she kept telling my daughter over the years. Yes! this is definitely PAS. My advice to you is don't ever give up being the best parent "you" can be. Your child(ren) will always remember the good things you do with them. I get the impression from your article you are from South Dakota. It is very difficult for a Father to gain custody in this state no matter how perfect you are as a parent. Many judges in this state believe the mother will do what is in the best interest of the child and therefore will blindly grant custody of the child(ren) to the mother. I know from my own experience that is not the answer to the childs physical and emotional health. My youngest daughter is now 9 and is having a very difficult time because her mother (who has full custody) is best friends with the 1st ex and is getting all sorts of advice on how to alienate. The problem in South Dakota that I am finding is trying to get the case back in court. It seems she has to commit a major felony just to get the courts to reevaluate the case. In any case, don't give up on your children no matter how tough the other parent is making your life. We have to sacrifice alot for our children, but it is worth it in the long run.  (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

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Post # 00000ad4
Re: Is this alianation
From: amy
Remote Name: 216.190.159.110

Comments
I am sick just finding out from our counslers that pas is happening to me .my childern hate me wish i was dead. my son showing ODD behaviors and he told the counsler he wants to see me but his step-mom says WHY DO YOU WANT TO SEE HER ANY WAY? she stole my life and theres. This is sick how can this not be veiwed as mental abuse? keeping them in that home will never stop this she is ajealous SICK lady I have prove now. what do I do? NO$ FOR LEGAL help mn. sucks for laws. I will fight for my 3 babies with every breath I have left in me. HELP screaming aloud but alone!    (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

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A related post asking "Is this Alienation": 

Post #  00000512
Is this alientation?
From: stressedsm
Remote Name: 198.209.214.56

Comments
My SD is 13. We live in MO. Bio mom and bio dad were never married and didn't live together when my sd was born. I have been with SD's dad (DH) since she was 1 year old. DH didn't get to see his daughter until she was 2. BM has Sole cusotdy. When they finally went to court it was 1st and 3rd weekend Sat and sun. Very minimal time. No time in the summer and very little at holidays. Mostly the day of and only 9 - 6. BM has always bad mouthed DH to my SD. We went back to court when SD was 11 to modify agreement. We got EOW from Friday to Sun. The weekend of each holiday and the day before and after July 4 and extra time at Christmas, 4 weeks in the summer, and shared transportation. We also had it added that neither parent was to speak in a deragatory manner about the the other parent in the presence of the child. For about a year everything seemed to be going good. SD seemed happy. Lately, SD has been quieter and sneakier. We have caughter her listening in on our conversations from downstairs or from the next room. She has stolen a bank receipt. When DH confronted BM about her stealing the receipt BM denied ever discussing CS in front of SD or talking negatively about DH in front of her. Which we all know better. When SD was just 10 she gave her the choice of rather or not to visit DH. She doesn't encourage SD to call or visit. She has SD call and to change plans or ask important questions that should be between BM and DH. I could go on. Anyway, DH feels like he has never really had the best relationship with his daughter and feels it is mostly BM's fault. We have two children together and they love their half sister and enjoy seeing her. We have discussed ending visits. I have suggested counseling to him and he doesn't think BM would agree. What can we do?   (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

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