Posts from former Discussion pages 

Parental Alienation with Teenagers

NOTE: These posts are presented 'as is' as the poster wrote, with no editing.  The poster's ISP address is included as it was required to create the original post.

 

Post #  0000045a
late teen extended PAS
From: rgb8@cornell.edu
Remote Name: 208.14.92.248

Comments
Any feedback on 16 & 17 year-old teenage girl and boy heavily indoctrinated/alienated by custodial father against mother? Any similar age group circumstances been/being experienced? Prognosis? Outcomes? Advice? Resource personnel? Any assistance would be greatly appreciated. Thanks...   (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

***

 

REPLIES:

Post #  00000514
Re: late teen extended PAS
From: marina [last name removed]
Remote Name: 169.237.71.238

Comments
My alienated daughters are 14 and 16. We have gone through deprogramming after I received sole custody. The Dr. who can help is Dr. Randy Rand out of Mill Valley California. He is a forensic Phychologist who helps them develop critical thinking as opposed to reflexive thinking.  (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

***

Post # 00000469
Re: late teen extended PAS
From: sandicos55@hotmail.com
Remote Name: 24.56.228.123

Comments
Have you received any response? I, too, have gone through a similar situation. Please let me know. Thanks  (Last changed: February 26, 2006 )

***

Post # 0000049e
Re: late teen extended PAS
From: mjmiller@nabbnet.com
Remote Name: 63.161.2.60


Comments
Yes, if you get positive response regarding your teenagers I would like to know also. Thank you. 
(Last changed: February 26, 2006)

***

Post # 00000526
Re: late teen extended PAS
From: scorpiogirl
Remote Name: 128.227.117.40

Comments
Wish I had something good to tell you. Marina is very lucky. I was dragged through the system for two horrible years. Have seen dozens of counselors w/and w/o the kids. The now-ex called police on me 3X. The 1st time had me thrown out of our house w/a 3wk. restraining order. By then, he had a lawyer, the house and the time to brainwash and manipulate our kids. My then 13yr. old daughter was more then willing. I was the "mean" mom who had rules and actually enforced them. All the ex did was talk and talk. He mananged to talk me into waiting to divorce until after Xmas, so the kids could have "one more "normal" holiday." Come Jan. he pulled a fast one and I never saw it coming. Pulled my daughter's ponytail once, after asking her to turn the computer off 3X. Then I was accused of yanking my son's shirt off, after I had to chase him around the house (while the ex sat in his lounge chair making eye contact w/my daughter). Boy, was I stupid! Next day he and my daughter filed an abuse charge. Her girlfriend's Mom called to tell me, my daughter had called her's and told her she was hurting herself to make it look like I bruised her. The daughter testified. The case was dropped. When I went home Children and Families was waiting for me. Of course, the ex's lawyer told him to call them. They threatened me and told me if I didn't leave they would put the children in foster homes and it would look bad for me to the judge. If I knew then what I know now, I NEVER WOULD HAVE LEFT. But I was in shock, scared and had know experience with anything like this EVER. The first judge was very astute and told ex to stop calling the police. He ordered a psych eval. for ex, daughter and me and a custody eval. Daughter called the police on me too after that. My sister and I went to pick up my younger son. She tried to stop us. What a mess! Months of heartache later and thousands of dollars, the custody eval. was done. All reports cited alienation as a major factor. The daughter's Forensic Psychiatrist recommended custody with me, as the parent who would most encourage a relationship w/the other parent. And also set boundaries and direction w/better understanding of teenage girls. The custody eval. recommended I get full custody of both kids. The GAL said he was worried daughter would run away (like normal two parent teenagers don't?) but that I should definitely have custody of my son. Oh well. The evaluation took so long we had a new judge who saw us for a total of two days. The ex, his family and the lawyer lied their butts off and she bought it. No one I know could believe it. Our (then) family counselor was shocked. My lawyer was so disturbed, she has actually taken $4000.00 off my bill. I'm lucky to have a decent relationship w/my now 9 yr. old son and visitation. My daughter is extremely hostile towards me, will not talk to anyone in my family and has been given a pass to never talk to me again, if she doesn't want to. Lately, I have thought of writing her a letter about my thoughts and feelings. I also have hope that when her brother is older, he may be able to talk some sense into her. It's so sad. We were in counseling for awhile and may go back. I had to move and haven't had enough money to pay what I already owe the guy. I keep pretty good track of her and make a point of going to all student events at her school. I am very interested in hearing and learning more about intervention or reunification. I have read a lot and just started reading Divorce Casualties. I also participate in the website "Empowered Mother's Without Custody". I highly recommend that site. There's a lot of good advice and big hearted mom's there. A lot of it is still sad and really hard to read, similar to this site.   (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

***

Post #  0000055c
Re: late teen extended PAS
From: snuz2luz
Remote Name: 152.163.100.197

Comments
this could have been my case. Exactly the same thing happened to me, but I had the money for the lawyer and it still didn't help. Now my ex has "emancipated" my handicapped son since he turned 18 even tho he just moved him in with him and the sister (son idolizes her) to finish his senior year of high school in a place where they will just pass him on. He was attending a school that actually educated him but ex chose not to visit it as he agreed in court to do. Anyhow, now I have two kids who don't speak to me or anyone in my family. However, it will be interesting next year since ex has promised son that he will go to college. Son doesn't meet any of the requirements to be admitted anywhere except a group home at this stage. Ex cuts his meat, ties his shoes, helps him walk up stairs, etc. all stuff he is capable of.   (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

 

 

END OF THIS TOPIC.

 

 

 

RETURN TO TOPIC INDEX

 

RETURN TO HOME PAGE OF 
PARENTAL ALIENATION WEB SITE

 

Disclaimer: The content of old discussion pages belongs to the original poster.  PsyCare Inc. and Dr. Douglas Darnall, Ph.D. assumes no responsibility for the views expressed in any posting.